Few experiences can be assimilated to becoming a mother. From the news of knowing that a baby is on the way, the transformation that is experienced during pregnancy and the great change of life that occurs when children arrive, is an adventure like no other.
It is because of that a mother writer decided to express her experience with motherhood through short poems, in which he captures the feelings of thousands of mothers and shares them in a project entitled "The pregnancy of the unicorns". We talked to her and shared a little about her perspective on motherhood as a mother and writer.
Her name is Laura Torné, she is 35 years old and she is the mother of a 17-month-old boy, whom she usually calls "La Bebestia" and is the undisputed protagonist of her project. She is a writer and works in an advertising agency, although she tells us that this poetry is something that she already had since she was a child:
The first poetry I wrote was with 7 years. And it stayed deep inside, because I know it by heart! An ode to heartbreak. I watched many soap operas with my grandmother, I suppose they were my source of inspiration.
Like many women, when she became a mother Laura realized that there are still many things that do not tell us and that motherhood is not really that pink that has long drawn us. That's when he decides to resort to writing, as catharsis to express his feeling about what was happening to him:
When I got pregnant and discovered that nothing was as I expected, I vomited all my anger, disappointment and fear in the form of poems. And in the postpartum the same thing happened to me, so I kept writing. It was not a preconceived idea, it simply emerged, as self-help.
When I gathered a number of poems, I thought it might be good to share them with the world, with other women, mothers, families, and decided to open an instagram account: @elembarazodelosunicornios. And my husband, Martino Pannofino, who is a graphic designer, was encouraged to illustrate them to give him a touch of humor and color. So it has ended up being a family project where we all contribute our grain of sand.
The name of his project jumps a lot, especially because of that air of fantasy he gives when using a mythological creature as the protagonist. Laura explains to us why the choice of this name and how it relates to becoming a mother:
I am very fan of unicorns and the magical world that surrounds them. And precisely, the idea of pregnancy seems to be wrapped in the same happy, ideal and brilli-brilli world. So I made a reflection: What would happen if the unicorns got pregnant? Exactly the same thing that happened to me. That they would face down on reality and discover another much more crude and animal motherhood.
In his poems we can find various themes and situations that we live as mothers, some in humorous touch, such as those moments in which we yearn to be alone, but we end up missing our children:
The classic #crianza CONFESSION Sometimes we need a child's respite To go to dinner for a walk to watch series through a tube as before or simply recover our intimacy as a couple (how cornered is when you become a mom and dad). And the same thing always happens to us. It is leaving him with the yayos and after a little while, we miss him We talked about him, we looked at his photos, we asked for videos ... Once we forbade touching the subject baby and whoever did it paid the bill (I repeatedly lost #loser). And then, when we're going to look for him, at 30 he gives him a tantrum and we already want to lose sight of him for another little bit #malamadre! It's crazy or not? Do you need these breaks Tell me what's wrong with you too #maternity #maternity # breast # mother # motherhood real # pregnancy # pregnant # pregnant # birth # postpartum # parenting # breastfeeding #child # baby #children #poesia #verse #poema #instamama #amorinconditional #conmiradademadre #puroamor #mamarazzi #babyboom #rosa #unicorn #mum
And also, when we breastfeed and taking out the tit becomes something so usual, that we do everywhere:
Take out the tit # lactation When I gave birth, I stopped having # tits I explained myself I had more than ever (and how I liked and liked it), but now they had a very important mission to feed my # baby So, take out the #teta when he he asked me it seemed the most natural thing in the world Di de #mamar in bars while I also ate at street benches, on the bus on the plane sitting on stairs of shopping centers, in front of officials doing paperwork in an ikea room inside of ikea (seemed to be part of the set) and even walking down the street, difficult but not impossible # 9 months before, having to take the tit in any of these places would have seemed to me from earth, swallow me How things change (EVERYTHING) when Do you become #mother? Any problems with giving the #cout in public? Some curious place that I did not try #maternity #pregnant #unicorn #poema #rosa #family #love #baby #hardwork #maternityreal #instamama #amorinconditional #emba Reason #pregnancy #postparto #reallife #love #mother #feeding #demand #protect #tetapower
But also, Laura dedicates some of those little poems to more sensitive issues, such as gestational loss:
The ghost children The brave #history of musa @ isabelsm76 turned into #poema #embarazo #perdidagestacional You have told me stories of all kinds. And today touches one of those who are not laughing. Because the pregnancies are full of sad moments and we must talk about them, uncover them! That is why today we have to get into the skin of @ isabelsm76, a # strong mother who has two beautiful # children and who lost two more in different pregnancies A mother who He made 4 children with the same #love and he regrets not being able to shout that he misses those who are no longer there, he loves them because it is rare for the rest of the world He has to talk more about these issues publicly Do not hide it among friends or #family. Make it stop being weird And so, normalizing this sadness, we will make it less sad for sure! A lot of strength and affection to Isabel and all those who have gone through the same situation #maternity #unicorn #mama #hardwork #maternityreal #instamama #amorinconditional #pregnancy #poetry #postparto #crianza #maternal breastfeeding #vers #pregnant #spontaneous abortion #rosa #conmradademadre #maternity #bebe #gestational grief #musa #puroamor
And also, of something that many women have in common after becoming mothers: the feeling of guilt for knowing if we are doing things right or wrong with our children.
Double birth The #history of #musa @redality turned into #poema #crianza Irene has no hairs on her tongue and between dye and cut (she is the most stylist of bcn) she tells me a lot of stories. And now that it is #mother we have much more to talk about when I visit her. She is a bearer of the #maternity real and on the last day the prota of the chatter was the FEELING OF GUILT Since she gave birth, she accompanies her whatever she does And I realized that I also want the best for our children, but also for us, and we end up becoming #mamasochists Thank you Irene for not cutting a hair (and cut them so well to me). If you feel like renewing look and sharing confidences, you will find it in @rojobcn And you, do you have this damn guilty feeling #maternity #unicorn #mama #hardwork #instamama #amorinconditional #pregnancy #pregnancy #poetry #post #parts #pregnant #rosa #conmiradademadre #maternity #bebe #puroamor #mamarazzi #partum #child #musa #maternal breastfeeding #children
Laura tells us that in addition to let off steam and continue to feed her passion for writing, seeks to talk more about those moments and situations of "real motherhood" that we don't always see:
My passion is to write, so I have a lot of fun when I do it, but above all, my goal is to tell the truth about real motherhood. Let other mothers know that they are not alone, that nothing is easy, that it happens to many of us, that this motherhood is not as pink as they paint it.
I asked him if there was a particular issue of motherhood that he had trouble writing, because as we know, there are stages that can be very complicated, such as postpartum:
The first few days after giving birth, after a while I felt a certain rejection towards my son. I didn't understand what was happening to me and I just wanted to cry or sleep or have it away. And when I started writing on this subject, although I had already left the terrifying postpartum and that devastating feeling behind, the memory returned to me in the form of grief. And it hurt. It is sad not to be able to enjoy, like other people around you, a moment as beautiful as the arrival of a child.
In general, Laura is a mother like all, who enjoys motherhood every day, but also encounters hundreds of doubts, fears and fears, although in the end, everything goes well thanks to our main motivation, our children:
I think being a mother is the hardest thing about being a mother. No one prepares you for that, no matter how much you read, go to prepaid classes or feel super physically and mentally. And easy there is nothing. Every new thing is a challenge. Even wanting it madly is difficult at first, when you are sore, dead of sleep and crazy hormones. What a pity ... Now I want it greatly!
Finally, we asked him to share some advice or comment for other mothers who read him and feel identified with the experiences of motherhood that he captures in his poems:
As I always say, nothing is as pink as they paint it, but not as black as it seems. Because everything happens and incredible moments arrive. Motherhood drives you crazy, in a bad way and also in a good way, because being a mother is wonderful madness. And if they read this and don't believe it, time to time, word. Here one that went through the same thing and I am alive and HAPPY.
You can read more than the poems about motherhood that Laura writes (and share your story) on her Instagram account: The Pregnancy of the Unicorns.
Photos | Laura Torné / The Pregnancy of the Unicorns
